Define Single Mommyhood...

Single mommyhood...

I'm fresh out of pearls of wisdom. This shit is hard. It's not for the faint of heart. But you can do it. Anyone who looks into the eyes of their child and feels that their well-being means more than their own breath can do this, and do it well.

Single mommyhood means not getting your hair done for a year straight, snipping at split ends the best that you can, and just accepting that it's an extravagance you can no longer swing. Glancing at a new pair of jeans with longing when yours are too tight or too loose, and instead, moving to the kid's section. Late night stomach bugs, where you and your baby are both running to the bathroom and you have to take care of her first, no matter how sick you are--because there's no one else. It means losing friends because they just can't understand that your kid comes first.

In some cases, unfortunately, it means holding onto your peanut while he or she sobs because their daddy won't pick up the phone, or just can't...And all the while, controlling that rage, keeping it below the surface to set a good example. Single mommyhood means pasting a smile on your face while throwing glitter into the pile of ashes you guide your child through as you piece your lives back together. It's the art of coaxing a spoonful of sugar into any circumstance you possibly can, in order to shield your child from how bad things (temporarily) are.

But, it is also Christmas morning--when you can bask in the knowledge that somehow, you managed to buy groceries for the month and put presents under that tree. It's lost teeth and fairy dust on a pillow, glittering against a grinning kiddo with holes in her smile. It's a quiet Saturday, cuddled up with your baby on the couch, watching cartoons, no longer fearing that angry words and stomach-churning tension will disrupt a perfect moment. It's a look your child gives you--that glint in her eyes that says you're her hero--and you are trusted and loved, unconditionally.

Single mommyhood is sacrifice and beauty all at once. And the point of this blog is to share the good and the bad--the secrets I have learned along the way--the frustration and the hope...

Never give up. You can do this, and you will.